shutting down

I have been working more on keeping my other blog more updated lately and also trying to write my son's story so yeah this blog has been neglected and I think its better that I just shut it down.

Come and see me over at dynamitt

random

folded clothes takes less space

but why does he speak greek?

Hubby and I are doing oki, but we are not very well to do. We started out with very limited funds and just a mattress on the floor and have slowly bought things and upgraded as we could afford it. We even manage to put away a fair bit of savings.

Now since we are doing better we figured we needed to look into insurance. We just could not afford it first and then we just keep putting it of. We have public health care so we are fine for basic medical stuff, but if we ever need to go to a dentist or if we wanted to get our eyes checked out we have to pay out big bucks.

So we ave been trying to look into private health insurance. We did some research on the internet, but could not quiet figure out what would be the best option for us. We sent an email for an consultant to call us and hoping that person would be able to explain things better. The insurance person did call and I happen to pick up. He spoke english alright but this 'insurance language' is so difficult that he could just s well have spoken Greek. He went on a long explanation and after he finished he asked me what I wanted and all I could say was ' eeh what?'

I handed the phone over to hubby and he seem to understand a bit more, but in the end told the guy we needed to think about it .

So yeah that's what we are doing now.. thinking about it. And praying that we will understand this 'language' before we have a dental emergency

neat..

my jeans fit me again! Its a pretty tight fit, but they do fit. Made me feel pretty good. Now just to loose some of this tummy fat..

food and stuff

I'm trying to lose some weight. It is a bit challenging because I'm not really allowed to do any exercises yet and also because I love lollies.

So I started yesterday. I decided that I needed to eat small meals, frequently as to not overeat. The plan was to eat every 3 hour. Now this is what puzzles me; in the morning and until 2 pm I do very well. I eat breakfast at 7.30 -8.00, a snack at 11 and then lunch at 1 pm. I'm doing just fine. I am not hungry at all between the meals.

Now the afternoon is another story. I eat lunch at 1 pm right, at 2 pm hungry again. I drank lots of water and manage to wait to eat until 4 pm. Then I'm full for another hour... today I just had to eat dinner at 6 pm and then I got hungry again at 7pm

Why, am I so hungry in the afternoon and evening? Don't get it.

talking about rain..

I live in Oz now, but grew up in a small place in a skinny cold country way up north. Which is pretty much on the other side of the world. My hometown do not have very warm summers or cold winters, what we do have is... yup; rain. I use to joke about coming from a place where it rains about 360 days a year (and sadly it very close to the truth).

Anyway, I had to laugh hard when my sister showed me a message a friend had sent her:

" after God created the south-west part of the skinny cold country, he looked at what he had done and said; oh this part is just perfect - I need to have it washed everyday. And that was what happen..."

sad details

We got the official death certificate for the little one in the mail yesterday. There was one thing that caught both hubby and mine eyes on the form; the line 'never married'...

The form is standardised and of course designed to fit a person that lived a long life, hence there are space for not only date and place of birth, but also occupation and relationship statues. I'm still trying to figure out why the line 'never married' made us so sad. Maybe it was because we now have it in writing that the hopes and dreams we had for the little one will not happen.

the rainmakers

after what had happen in our life recently, hubby and I decided we deserved a nice little holiday. We call up a travel agency and told them to send us somewhere warm and sunny. We live probably in the best city here in Oz, but home city is very very cold and wet now during wintertime, so some sunshine was needed. Travel agency hooked us up with nice little hotel in a sunny little town - it looked very promising indeed.

The day of our departure home town was quit warm and sunny actually and we found it a bit ironic to leave, and when arriving in nice little sunny town that evening we found it even more ironic - it was pouring down...

Actually it did not really stop raining for the all the 5 days we were in little sunny town and the weather man on the news kept talking about that this is the most rain little sunny town have had in 8 years. So I guess we are quit the rainmakers, hubby and I.

We are glad to be back home now and we even got a couple of days with sunshine after we returned back home. Now its raining and cold again, but I don't care. The kettle is boiling and we have extra blankets if needed. And one day the sun will hopefully find us again and if not we might be recognized as rainmakers and be famous for saving this country from the dreaded drought.

until we see you again..

the little one did finally come, 5 days before his due date. He was still not to sure about this coming out of me thing and even though my water broke, he was quit comfy in there and got stuck. He was forced out via c-section and I was thrilled to not be pregnant anymore

Unfortunately the little one only greeted us with a short visit. He stayed with us for 4 days before he moved on to Heaven. He was beautiful and so sweet and I miss him dearly. I have to keep reminding myself that he is in a better place now.

The little one was very very sick and had so many problems that trying to fix things with surgery would just have been cruel. We did know that he would have some problems, but we really held onto hope that it could be fixed, we were praying for a miracle.

Now almost 2 weeks later, I can see that we did get a miracle, just not quit the way we were thinking. Most babies with as many problems as the little one do not make it to term. So our miracle was that not only did the little one make it to term, he also stayed with us for 4 days after. 4 days where we was able to hold his little hands, tickle his feet and kiss him all over.

We cherish those 4 precious days and are grateful that we got to meet and know the little one.
Rest in peace my darling.

numby

I have been dealing with severe swelling in my legs since I was 30 weeks pregnant - that is 8 weeks ago. It is so bad that I can only sit on a chair with feet down for about 5 min or stand up for about the same amount of time. My legs start to hurt bad if I try to sit or stand longer. I can walk - sort of - but ever since the swelling reached the top of my thighs that is pretty hard too.

Now the last days I have noticed that my inner thighs and my 'private' has gone numbed. I wonder what that is all about. Hubby is worried and want to take me to the hospital today. I do wanna go and I want the little one out but I also worried that they will say no or that the little one will get more problems if he is born now.

The ideal will be that he is born by c-section later this afternoon/evening now how do I go about to convince a very conservative hospital to do that...

just keep swimming..

Hubby took me to the pool today. We seem to have picked a bad day though because the pool was full of bratty kids, but I still got about 30 min of feeling light again. I love the feeling as soon as I step into the water and my legs moves easy again and I cant feel the weight of my tummy. The time in the pool did nothing for my swelling, but at least I felt good for a little while. The little one seem to like it too, he was squirming around in my tummy.

There was a couple of odd guys at the pool though. On older guy seem to be asleep in the sauna. I got a bit worried about him actually and asked the lifeguard to check on him. He was alright apparently just tired or something. When we left he was staring at all the kids, seemed a bit creepy actually - or maybe I'm just to paranoid..

Then there was Mr Snorkel. Another older guy was wearing a snorkel mask and just layed in the pool with his face down in the water. Can't imagine there is much to look at, at the pools bottom. He was doing weird things with his arms and legs too and hubby commented that he was probably exercising.

Hubby tried to do a few laps, but realized he was not in very good shape anymore.I guess getting all of your wife's pregnancy cravings can do that to you.

its time to go

little one. I have given him eviction note today. I have had enough of this and feel so uncomfortable. Hubby has tried to talk to him to and told him he needs to come out and play with daddy. I got this feeling that he wont listen to either of us...I guess that means we are in for a lot of fun in the future.

long day

today was our 37 week appointment and also the day where we got to catch up with the child birth class we missed last week.

We had to get up at 7.30 which was just when I was really comfortable - I hate alarm clocks! The child birth class was good. Very quick compare to the groups we use to go too, so I guess we were lucky there. We finally got to see a birth suite. It was a bit different then I expected. The birth suite was basically a smaller ward, with nurses station in the middle and then rooms for labour and delivery all around. There was also showers and a loung room where people could wait.

We got to see 3 newborn babies. One boy was 4 kg and looked HUGE - I feel sorry for that mum pushing him out.

When the class was finished we went to grab some lunch and then it was time for me to sit with my legs up. We went back to the hospital and hubby got me all set up with two chairs and a newspaper. He then asked if he could go and check out a book store around the corner, I was happy with my newspaper so that was no problem.

He came back about 30 min later with a friend and his wife. Turns out my hubby got thinking on his way to the book store - hey my friend lives here and I have not seen him in 6 months, wonder what he is up too. They all came back and we had coffee and a nice chat, made our 2 hours waiting so much more fun.

Our doctors appointment was at 3pm and last time they made us wait for an hour and a half before they called us in, we were joking about how long it would take this time. Amazingly enough we were called in five minutes past 3. I think that is the shortest we have waited ever. All was good. The little one is active and kicking and my blood pressure is good. The doctor was still consern about my giant swollen legs and she seem to be in favor of inducing me maybe before the due date. Lets hope that will happen.

Went to buy new undies, size elephant, afterwards and also a new camera. All this made it a very long day, so I was glad when I could sit down in my bed at home and eat the leftover of my apple pie. Feel so much better now.

the beginning

Im Ri, living with my hubby in a city of Oz. We are waiting for the little one to arrive in about 20 days. Right now the little one is pretending my ribs are monkey bars. Its cool but also hurt a bit.

I decided to start this blog so I could write more freely about everything that happens in my life without being worried that my mum might read it. Let see how well this goes.